When Ozlem told me about the blog for Sedat I immediately wanted to go there, and once I got there I saw what I knew in my heart from when I first met him was true, Sedat was an amazing big hearted guy who was loved by so many. Just looking at the pictures and readying some of the stories it was plain to see that he touched everyone who was privileged to meet him. I met Sedat VERY shortly after Ozlem had met him. The day Ozlem met Sedat I will never forget. I was a dental student at NYU and I got this call from her saying that she met the man of her dreams. Me being the constant skeptic, I said "oh really" and she said "yes and I am going to marry him." Well I chuckled to myself and said "well then I want to meet him." Having known Ozlem since we were 5 years old I knew that she got excited over things really quickly so I didn't take her too seriously. A couple of days after our conversation Ozlem introduced me to Sedat. She just reminded me of my first comment to her which was "girlfriend he has chicken legs and he is so skinny." But I immediately saw something else, I saw a man with a huge heart that accepted me as Ozlem's oldest friend and tried to become my friend as well. He wanted to get to know me and that impressed me. He was doing this for Ozlem. I think since he met her most of everything he did was for her. She was the twinkle in his eye and he loved her instantly. I remember that shortly after meeting him she went to his house in NJ for a visit and she saw her picture on the refrigerator, when I heard this I knew that this was something special. It wasn't long there after I get another phone call saying "GIRLFRIEND I AM ENGAGED!!! Sedat asked me to marry him!!!" Though I was happy for her, part of me was thinking ARE YOU NUTS!! You want to be married so young? But I supported her because I knew that she had found her soul mate. Ozlem brought out the best in Sedat and Sedat definitely brought out the best in Ozlem. They grew and learned from each other.
I was very honored to be the Maid of Honor at their wedding. (Ozlem and I had promised each other as little girls that no matter what happened we would be each other's Maid of Honor.) A wedding that Ozlem (and Sedat) planned with much love and attention to detail. It was a day I will never forget. Ozlem looked like a beautiful princess and Sedat was her knight in shinning armor. I remember thinking wow they have a beautiful strong love because they over came a lot to make it to this day, and what a special day it was. Everything was perfect, just as Ozlem had planned. Though I was a bit sad that I was loosing my dearest friend, I was happy that she was happier than I had ever seen her, that she had a man that loved her as much as she loved him if not more, and that her fairy tale was just beginning.
Time and distance and life sometimes gets in the way of friendships, so some time passed where our friendship weakened and we lost touch. Though we didn't speak Ozlem was never far out of my mind. I always thought about her and about Sedat. Then I received an email announcing that she was pregnant with Okan. I was so happy for her and Sedat. Then I received pictures of them as a happy little family. It warmed my heart and part of me was envious that Ozlem had found her soul mate so early in life and I was still waiting for mine. Their first holiday card as a family was straight out of a magazine, it was simply beautiful, and believe it or not I still have it! (I will post it soon and I have more pictures to post as well.) The next important event in their lives I swore I wouldn't miss, and that was the birth of little Onur. I will never forget the joy on Sedat's face as he welcomed a second son into the world. He was floating on air and beaming as he stared adoringly at his beautiful wife and his amazing new son. I was newly engaged to my soul mate at the time and I remember Sedat telling me that he cant wait for us to have a baby because being a father is amazing. Sedat loved being a father and a husband, his family was the most important thing in his life and everything he did was a constant testament to this.
My next big memory of him was at my wedding. What an amazing guy!! Octavian and I will never forget that. I had asked Ozlem if Okan could be in the wedding as my ring boy, and of course she said yes, however there was a slight hitch. She was my Maid of Honor and would be busy with her duties and it would be hard for her to care for Okan. So of course who is the hero of the day, you guessed it Sedat. Amazing Sedat, without a word of complaint drove Okan to the wedding, helped him though the ceremony. Little Okan stole the show when he decided to walk down the isle with the pillow on his face, thus needing Sedat's help to reach the altar. Then Sedat drove back to NJ dropped Okan off and drove all the way back to eastern Long Island, and as our limo pulled up to the hall he was there with a smile on his face to greet us! AMAZING! My husband Octavian will never forget that and he will always be thankful. After all the driving he still had the energy and good spirit to have fun, and I have proof of this because I have him dancing up a storm on my wedding video.
I think though the best memory if Sedat for me and my husband still is that of him with his boys and Ozlem. He was always happiest when they were around. He glowed when he was holding the boys and his eye lit up whenever the looked at Ozlem. We were at Okan's 4th birthday and I was 10 weeks pregnant with my daughter and no one was happier than Sedat. He said to my husband "you will love nothing more in your life than you will your family". My husband will never forget how happy Sedat was when he talked to him about fatherhood and family. Octavian, my husband, remarks to this day how he never saw a happier guy around his family, it was plain to see that they were his life. We are more that 100% sure that he is watching Ozlem and the boys from heaven and he will forever be their angel and protector and he will always be daddy.
The moment I got the news from Rahmi I was in the hospital with my daughter as she was going through the fight of her life. Ozlem had just called me the night before and was telling me how strong she thought I was for being able to deal with almost losing my daughter and I remember her saying that she didn't think she would be as strong, I was surprised at this comment and it made me cry because I had always considered Ozlem much stronger than me. When I got the message from Rahmi I remembered our conversation and in tears though well Ozlem you again will prove to be the strong one. When I hung up the phone with Ozlem she had mentioned that she was going to go check on Sedat because he had gone to sleep, when I learned how the events leading to his passing happened, I felt guilty for taking her phone call because maybe she would have found him sooner. But I have learned a great deal about life from almost losing my daughter and from Sedat's passing and that is that though we can make plans for things we have no control as to where life takes us. I always believed that things in life happen for a reason, though we may never stop asking why, we will learn from everything that happens to us.
I had never left my daughter's side since she went to the hospital, and there were times when I didn't even go outside her room for over a week, but I had to be at Sedat's funeral and so did my husband. Octavian was in shock when I broke the news and we both agreed that it wouldn't hit us until we went to the funeral to see for ourselves, but even having been there it still doesn't feel real. I guess its impart due to Sedat's warmth still being around us. I still expect to wake up and see him still with us.
I think about Ozlem and the boys all the time. When my daughter Stefanie was in the hospital I always said to my husband, maybe with out Stefanie I could live but without you I would never want to live and these words and feelings hit me each time I think about Ozlem and the boys. I have prayed for Ozlem to find the strength and the courage to deal with her loss and for the boys to never for get the short precious time they had with their wonderful father. I am consoled by the fact that there are many people around the boys to tell them about Sedat and what a wonderful man he was and I am sure they will always feel him in their lives. I am happy that Ozlem has such a strong network of support. I know Ozlem is resilient and strong and no matter what she finds her way though nothing anyone says or does will ever take her immense pain away, her family, her boys and Sedat's love from heaven will help her find her new road in life.
I promise to add pictures but we are still unpacking in our new house, on top of work and taking care of my daughter, but I promise to do it as soon as possible…
Much love to Ozlem, Okan, and Onur!
Love always,
Michelle (Sandy), Octavian, and Stefanie Ion
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